This has pretty much been my weekend…
Got to leave work early and spend Friday with Craig 😀
Chelsey and Mandie (pictured above photo-bombing) came out to stay with me in Ann Arbor yesterday. It was great to catch up with Mandie–can’t remember the last time her and I hung out.
That was the yummiest salad I’ve ever made…and the only ingredients: spinach, feta cheese, and raspberry walnut vinaigrette dressing. mmmmm.
Now to figure out what to do with the rest of this Sunday night. Kind of feel like I should try to get some work done, but then part of me thinks I ought to just enjoy the rest of the weekend before what is likely to be another hectic week at work. Hmmmmmm.
I was told, out of the blue, by my roommate (who is in her thirties) today that I’m the most mature 21 year-old she’s ever met, and that she thinks I’m probably more mature than she is. I wasn’t sure where the statement came from (we were talking about something totally unrelated), but I told her that she was almost positively wrong about the latter part of her statement, that I’d take it as a compliment anyway, and thanks.
She’s not the first person to ever tell me something like that, but today was the first time I ever really thought much of it. Probably because she went on to ask how I was raised (which, I didn’t really know how to answer) and if that might have something to do with it. To an extent, maybe? When I was really young, I think my parents both made my priorities very clear: school was my focus and getting good grades was my job. I was never spoiled, though I was fortunate enough to have everything I needed and the ability to work for the things I really wanted.
And then there’s the other part of it, I think, that has more to do with seeing where my parents struggled and some of the mistakes they made. They got married and had my brother and I when they were really young–just out of high school. Neither got a college degree; my mom never took her education beyond high school, and my dad tried to do some community college classes when I was little, but I don’t know what ever happened with that. I imagine it was probably too much to be supporting two kids, coaching their sports teams/staying involved in their lives, and working full time. But I watched them struggle with money when I was younger; I remember asking for things at the store and being told “no” because we were “broke.” And I remember, after that, being careful to use disclaimers whenever I asked for things (“Can I have this?…or are we still broke?”) Granted, we always had what we needed, and things did get a lot better, but of course I still remember those times.
I think that actually has a lot to do with why I’ve always tried to be as financially independent as possible, and I’m proud of that. Part of it was wanting to make the burden less on my parents when I knew things were rough, but another part of it is just not ever wanting to have things handed to me by someone else. I’ve been completely financially independent since I was eighteen, and it’s taught me a shit ton. I’ve seen some of my friends flunk out of college after just one year because their parents completely paid their way and they never thought twice about what the actual point of being in school was. I’ve also seen friends have cars given to them by their parents and have the nerve to complain about them. I never want to be that ungrateful.
To an extent, though, I actually need to get better about being able to let people pay for things for me every once in awhile. This has become really obvious since Craig and I started dating, because he is totally old-fashioned (which, I love). But it sometimes conflicts with me always wanting to pay for things on my own. I have gotten a little bit better, but I’m working on it. Same with my mom; when I lived with her, she constantly wanted to pay for things and I hated it.
And as much as I love both of my parents and as much as they are awesome and did a great job raising me (at least, I think so), I also think it’s only natural to want to learn from your parents’ mistakes. I also think it’s pretty normal to see things about your parents, growing up, that you want to avoid in your own life. Hence I’m 21, not married yet, and definitely haven’t had kids and do not plan on having kids for awhile (if at all). I’m happy with where I am, and I know what my priorities are.
Still, I think my roommate overstated my maturity by a long shot. Chelsey, Mandie, and I got the cops called on us last night. Some things will never change. 😀